Screen name: luna, kiseki
Age: 16 (tiger ^^v)
Sign: on cusp of Pisces and Aries
Where: Aussie ^^
Aspirations: To rule the universe and let all fear the Mighty Mallet Mua Ha Ha.
Likes: Cuddly and furry stuff. Also like mangos, watermelons, pears, lychees..etcetc
Dislikes: Tarepanda/Hello Kitty/Mashi Maro...contradicting myself about all things cuddly. Stupid thumbnails, broken links/pics, stupid javascripts that does nothing but add to load time, Gator, stories that don't end..
Hobbies: Anime! Volleyball, writing, drawing, reading, dissing people
Current favourite reads:
Manga dark shoujo - Count Cain
Manga light shoujo - DNAngel
Anime fantasy - X-1999
Anime comedy- Ranma ½
« The Fionavar Tapestry »
« The Obernewtyn Chronicles »
« Darkfall »
Favourite characters:
GW - Duo + Quatre
KNO - Sana + Akito
AS - Kira + Katou + Zaphkiel
FY - Nuriko + AmiSu + Renhou
YYH - Kurama + Hiei + Jin
RK - Soujirou + Aoshi
NAR - Dewey
CCS - Yue + Li + Eriol
Angelic Layer - Oojirou + Ichirou
MKR - Eagle + Lantis
Legend of Basara - Sarasa
X-99 - Nataku, Sorata + Karen X
AnC - Yuuhi
Least favourite couples: Touya + Aya; Tamahome + Miaka (*stomp kick punch thump defenestrate*); Usagi Tsukino + Mamaru.
Favourite authors:
Isobelle Carmody
Victor Kelleher
Terry Pratchett
Louise Cooper
With tribute to:
Diarmiud, Darian (Fionavar)
Nuriko, Suboshi (FY)
Jik (Obernewtyn)
Kira, Zaphkiel (AS)
Shuro, Chidori, Aki (AnC)
Devon (Count Cain)
Quiz results:
I am like...
Count Cain: Cain Hargreaves
Anime girl: Miyu (Vampire Princess)
Bishounen: Kira Sakuya
Anime cliche: Hard-headed female
Mystical creature: Phoenix
X 1999: Arashi Kishyuu
Angel Sanc: Sevi (evil n creepy LOL)
Harry Potter: Harry Potter ~~;
Inuyasha: Sesshoumaru
Magic girl: Utena
Obernewtyn: Elspeth
Anime: Blade of the Immortal
Tortall Character: Alanna
Legend of Basara: Sarasa
I belong in the...the future
I am a...storyteller
My Tarot is...the Wheel of Fortune
Also a...moonflower
I am a...mage
I ride a...golden dragon Oo??
I was a...philosopher
I am an obscure...wombat
My Misfit Talent is...Empath-Healer
My Enneagram type is...Type 5
My element is...fire
Plans:
- Go through the Angelfire and fix links and images
- Finish the Subaru winamp skin from a year ago T__T
- Finish going through various works for flair
- Work on "Fealty" Part II
- Plan and hopefully get further on "Prophecy" Part III
archive
miles short of a miracle
powered by pitas
Interesting rants
viva forever || belinda
solace || fiona
"if you didn't mean to hurt then it's not your fault" I don't agree with that. It was the sign-in on my friend's MSN. It's just a great excuse isn't it? Oops, I killed my friend by giving him the drugs he asked for, but you know, I never meant any harm, it's not my fault. the beauty of ranting I don't really know what to say, but just that I've been enjoying myself browsing through other people's blogs. It's great how some people transform a simple weblog into an insight to themselves and their perception of the world. I wonder if people blog so that other people can read it, so that they hide themselves even when they are blogging, or do they blog so that it is for their own eyes only? But I've realised some people put negative things in their blogs. I wonder if that's because their life is overall perceived quite negatively by them, or if they just tend to let out their depression by blogging that way?
time creeps up behind you like windshield on a bug Gah, I love this quote, forgot who said it though. Sheesh, I've drawn a total of 2 artbooks + 32 pages of anime art plus other miscellaneous pieces that's drawn on scrap paper during class. Must say it's quite obvious to see the style change. In the beginning, the mouths were abnormally small, the eyes all the same and very glassy, the faces really demented. And then I went through a "sharp-chinned" stage, where all of my characters looked really sharp-chinned and angular. Even though the style's weird, I actually liked that period of work, and I can't go back to that style any more T___T And then I went through a short period of Kaori Yuki style. Right now I'm sort of experimenting with various styles, so I've come up with some varied pictures.
solitude is my friend Yay, went on a wallpaper making spree (since my net decided not to work yesterday) and made another 2 wallpapers! A mirrored one for DNAngel, this time with Dark and a white background, and one for Random Walk. I don't really like Random Walk...the girls in it seems to be the type that I would never like...those ones too absorbed in their looks and getting the guys' attention. I want to read Ultra Maniac though ^^; It sounds really funny. Ack, I still haven't been able to find my Kodocha *falls into depression*
...without pain, you cannot truly appreciate love...yet without love, there is only more pain... Mono seems to have left Neopets Oo; I don't know if it's just a little joke, or what's in his userlookup is for real, and I haven't talked to him in so long. I feel kinda...depressed? Guilty? I know I'm from a completely different society to him. His is the **** this world I'm sick of it attitude, living it out on drugs and alcohol, tearing desperately towards some sort of relief, that seems to only come with death. A year ago when I still had time to waste on Neoquest, he was in depression, that much was obvious. Very few people on the NQ board seemed to have no problems with their lives. Maybe that's what drove me away, maybe it was because I no longer shared the boredom those people had when schoolwork piled in. Those people, as dear as they had been to me, were not like me. They cared little for schoolwork, and they seemed to be unable to see the sun shining in their backyard. About a week ago, right before New Years, I went back to the board, much as many other old regulars did. It was a nostalgic reunion, but the newer people, if anything, seemed even more in need of counselling than those before. Mono was acting half-crazed...It was as though he threw himself away into this insanity to forget that he was alive. Now he has walked away, he's fed up with family and friends, as he said. How many people does he represent? *lost* Yes yes, I am lost...Don't really know how to use this pitas thing Oo; It'll work out better than blogger though, that's for sure ^^; Good thing Optus allows remote loading..eek, otherwise >_>;;
Thursday, January 23, 2003 04:50 p.m.
Yeah, right.
The end doesn't justify the means, the means doesn't justify the end. Who are you to say that you shouldn't have to pay for something you have done? Who are you to go around hurting people without having to feel any remorse because, *ahem*, it's not my fault? (By the way, if that particular friend is reading this, don't take it personally, k? ^^) It's the very epitome of self-centredness and insensitivity. It's not the thought that counts. It's your actions. People don't fricken care whether deep down you love them or not. They care about whether you're there for them when it mattered the most. Yes, sometimes intention does account heavily. Sometimes we're bound to pity someone for their intentions, despite what they have done, but it doesn't cleanse them of their guilt. They have done something wrong, they can't run away from it just by a simple "I didn't mean it".
Tuesday, January 21, 2003 06:41 p.m.
Anyway, my stupidity woke me up today when I realised that school starts Wednesday next week instead of Thursday as I had though. Gaah.
As for work, there's plenty I need to do. I'm still at a standstill with my English major work. I have no idea what to write for my upcoming assessment: proposal of intention. A short story, that much is definite. And yet, I don't know else I'm doing. A collective? A single story? A single story combining several stories into one conglomerated mess? I'm not a great person on plot, I think my plot twists are cliched and predictable.
I have been reading so much manga and Chinese books my English is deteriorating. I think in Chinese now, can you believe it??? I always thought in English, but now things form in my head in Chinese, and in really lame manga language.
Other stuff. I've finished a Vampire Princess Miyu wallpaper today. I don't know, I always want to put more effort into my wallpapers, but I always end up in a dead end with nowhere to manoeuvre the elements. How long do people usually take for making a wallpaper? I can't do vectors, I think I really need to look at developing a different style on top of the one I use now. But speaking of the wallpaper, I actually liked how it turned out in the end. The image cleaning was a bit roughed up, as always, but the background managed to creat a sense of dirty, slimy blood creeping in a unsteady stream, which matched the anime quite well, albeit it didn't actually match the picture (since Miyu is smiling) ~~;
Enough ranting, and yes, I realise I need to change the header of my blog. It still says December T__T
Monday, January 20, 2003 07:16 p.m.
On the other hand, I've finished going through my Stormloader pages and updates will probably happen tomorrow or today. There are 4 new wallpapers, two for DNAngel, one for Count Cain and one for Random Walk. I love the Count Cain one. Okok, I have to admit there are lots about it I'm not happy with, but Cain looks so cool there...and the spooky darkness blah blah blah. Anyway ^^;
Speaking of beyond, it seems Candice has accepted me as a hostee ^^v That means a great less work during updates once school starts!
Friday, January 10, 2003 05:49 p.m.
I realise what I've said yesterday (the bits at the end) is probably a bit idealistic. Just the mood =P I don't know, yesterday wasn't a very good day. I checked up on rocksteadygirl and she was also depressed. And I read BluParadox's posts about suicide ~~;; I don't really approve of the idea of suicide - it's not that I don't understand why people would want to die, like Fuuma says: there are very few people in this world who haven't thought about dying some time in their lives. I've thought about death, sometimes it does seem appealing, just to close your eyes and walk away from everything. Sometimes I feel that my interests have been dampened and I may not feel too excited about waking up the next day. But really, I've never thought about suicide as a path to go down, because there are people in situations worse than me who are fighting to live on. Boredom and loneliness kill - they really do, but very few people have the right to turn away from the love and effort others have in helping them creating their lives thus far.
But sometimes I want to turn to my parents and say to them what I really think, but I know I can't because they won't listen. It's not a question of "Have you tried? If you don't try you never know!" It's a fact that I know my parents very well - but they don't know me very well. They have given me a name - Graceful Phoenix, and another name by which I was supposed to have been called, Sea Orchid. Both of these are lonely names. The phoenix flies alone, lives for half a millenium alone, rises from the ashes alone, but it needs to fly. I am a bird, I am also a tiger, I am a fire sign and a water sign, I can't be caged! The reason why I wasn't called Sea Orchid was because my parents thought that it was too lonely - a single flower floating aimlessly and uprooted in the oceans...But the ocean is my home, I am a Piscean.
Loneliness is worse within a crowd, it is suffocating when people rush at you with misunderstanding and falseness. Yes, I say this with a cynical tone, and I realise I am only addressing a number of people. I don't want to try and justify both sides of the argument ~~; Yes there are too many sides, too many facets to reflect on, but life is only so long.
Thursday, January 9, 2003 04:45 p.m.
All I'm saying is open your eyes. Feel the warmth of the sun and see that there is still love left in this world. Maybe it isn't raining as you thought it was. Maybe it is...but rain brings water and water brings life. If there is darkness then the moon and the stars still dance together across the sky. If you are alone, there are other people alone too. If you keep walking towards that cliff, you will never learn to live.
No humans can live without love and friendship. You can be alive, but it is not living. Money, power, sex....nothing can replace the feeling of security and warmth true friendship brings. Don't ask for too much. Real soulmates take thousands of years to find. Keep walking on and never regret the path you choose.
This may be unlike me to say. I will not say that I am not a depressed person. I have my own problems which I hide from others...that I am happy hiding from others. I don't believe that all problems are better discussed. I am strong enough to cope with these problems on my own. I am alone, but I accept that without walking further away from those who can give me the support that will make me forget my problems. Even if you can't find a friend who truly understand you, those people around you every day can still bring you happiness. Instead of taking drugs...why not absorb yourself into this world? It's the same effect. These things will make you temporarily forget your sadness...they cannot make them go away forever, but why waste your life on toxins?
Don't numb yourself...without love, there is only hate and spite. Satisfaction will not bring you happiness.
Wednesday, January 8, 2003 01:57 p.m.
Ok good good, this is working ^0^;; I'll have to go on ftp and change the link to page some time. Anyway, things I've been working on - I've done a lot of X/1999 and Tokyo Babylon avatars, but I've yet to hear from Kimiko to see whether she wants them or not Oo; Afterwards, I got bored and made a DNAngel wallpaper of Krad...I love his hair in this one ^^ It's so nice and golden...